Okay, you’ve got to know my youngest daughter to understand what I’m about to share.  Mollie is a four year old “fancy girl”, dramatic to the core, and nothing is frilly or girly enough for her.  Just the other night, she was modeling every pair of shoes I have in my closet, and you guessed it - the higher the heal, the more wrap-around ribbon and sequins, the less practical, the better.  The next day, when she was spending time at “Grandmom’s”, my mother went to put on her trusty old brown birks, comfy and practical.  Mollie looked at them with disdain and stated matter-of-factly, “Those shoes are not very princess-y.”  To which my mother replied, holding a grin from becoming a belly laugh,  “Well, I’m not a princess.”  Mollie, dead serious, countered, “No, you’re a queen.”  My mother could no longer contain herself and howled in amusement.  I guess a queen should not be seen in a pair of these.  Then again,  a queen should be able to wear whatever she wants.  hmmmm.

We took a fun family road trip to Nashville yesterday to check out the lights and decorations at the Opryland Hotel.  While we were there, we went through the Grinch ICE.  It was well worth the money and travel there.  “The Grinch who Stole Christmas” is one of our all time favorite Christmas specials.  “Who” doesn’t love it?!   It’s pretty frigid in there, and they give you these cool blue coats to wear that slip really well on the ice slides.  It’s open through January 4th, so check it out if you’re near enough to go. 

Well, so far we’ve looked at love, joy, peace, and now it’s time for patience.  That is one of those qualities people want everyone else to have but it is not so fun to try to grow some for yourself.  I hear myself say several times each day to my kids as they repeatedly call my name,  “Could you just be patient a second?!”  But it isn’t so simple to be the one practicing patience at a traffic jam, a long grocery store line, or when you’re in a heated “discussion” with a loved one.  Now is it?

The word for patience used in Galatians 5:22 can be translated forebearance or longsuffering.  And longsuffering is just that, suffering a long time.  The word comes from another root that means far or long.  The idea is to go a long time or long distance.  The other New Testament word for patience as found in Romans 5:3 means “an abiding under.”  It has the idea of cheerful or hopeful endurance or constancy, and it comes from a word which means to stay under, to remain.  Put the words together and you have the idea of remaining under for a long time.  Hmmm.

I’ve pretty much always thought about patience as simply waiting and doing so without getting too ruffled or whiney.  And while that is the way the word is often used in our English language, the meaning seems much richer in these Greek words.  The idea is that the Spirit of God produces within us as he dwells there, the ability to “stay” to remain under difficult circumstances and to keep a cheerful or hopeful countenance.  This is no mere outer conformance to difficult circumstances or the ability to put on a happy face or “suck it up” some more.  It is much deeper and more arduous than that.  It is impossible without the indwelling Spirit.

And it is not without groaning.  It is not a quick fix or a magic wand.  God isn’t into those things if you haven’t noticed, though we often demand just that.  No, it is learning to embrace this truth from Romans:  We ourselves, who have the firstfruits of the Spirit groan inwardly as we wait eagerly for our adoption as sons, the redemption of our bodies. . .the Spirit Himself  intercedes for us with groans that words cannot express.

It is worshipping the One who has been and continues to be patient and suffers long with his Creation and his redeemed ones.  He is patient with you, not wanting anyone to perish, but everyone to come to repentance. 

So often in Christian teaching, the emphasis becomes on what we need to do, rather than on God’s amazing work even when we can’t do anymore, or don’t want to, or are just plain weary.  A while back, I was deeply encouraged when thinking about Psalm 40.  It was a painful trial for our family, and when I thought of how I should handle it or what needed to be done next, I just couldn’t.  Have you been there?  Where you are just “done”?  Such a painful place to be, but really a good one.  Well, I found a curious encouragement from the words of the psalm.  I waited.  Then God inclined his ear and lifted me out of the slimy pit.  I could wait.  I could stay.  But I could do nothing more.  And God would do the rest.  Listen to U2’s famous rendition of this psalm.  It says it beautifully.

Okay, I admit that when I started thinking about this fruit of the Spirit, I expected to learn more about that “peaceful easy feeling” kind of peace.  As I studied, I was a bit surprised to find something remarkably different.  The kind of peace that the Spirit grows in our lives is a relational peace.  The Greek word is “eirene”, and it means to be or act peaceful.  Other ways of saying this is to be at peace, live in peace, or live peaceably.  The word comes from a root word “eiro”  which means to join.  So, the peace the Spirit brings is a peace of being joined together with God and others. 

Think about this with me.  Isn’t that the core of most of our problems?  That we are separated from God and others?  Isn’t that the horrific damage sin has caused every member of the human race?  That we no longer are joined together easily with God and those we love.  The fruit of the Spirit is peace.  What the Spirit likes to do is to join together that which sin has separated.  In our flesh we are at war with God and others.  We fight to stay alive and to take care of ourselves.  We look out for ourselves, even at dire cost to our relationships. 

Then throw in the mix that we are all looking for personal peace, that peaceful, easy feeling kind of peace I mentioned before.  But we want it without having to need God to provide it.  So, sin has destroyed our relationships by tearing us apart from those we want to love.  And on top of this, we are all seeking peace or rest in our lives, without having to trust God to bring it. 

Let me illustrate.  First of all, sin has separated what God wants to join.  Think about the divorce rate in our country.  And it isn’t any better within the church than it is outside.  Look at your kids, or your friends’ kids, or my kids.  No matter how much they love each other, there is always the lack of peace, eiro peace, in their relationships.  Just today, on the way home from grandmom’s house, my girls, who are the best of friends, began arguing about something unimportant.  The argument escalated into yelling and screaming and even throwing a boot at the other sister.  Sometimes it is hitting, pinching, pulling hair, or saying really mean words.  Then the peace is gone.  The smallest thing can cause separation.  Even in our best relationships.

Here’s a recent example from my life.  Last week I was supposed to join some friends for dinner, and at the very minute I was walking out the door, things fell apart at my house, with my tired kids.  And I mean really fell apart.  I was not able to go out with my girlfriends, and when I called to tell one of them about it, I accidentally took out my frustrations from my hard night on my friend.  Thankfully, she is a true friend, and we have made peace, but this just shows how easily separation happens.

Now, about that personal peace we are all fighting for.  What form does it take in your life?  “I don’t get a moment’s rest from all of this laundry and all of the demands.  Moma this.  Mama that.”   “I just staightened up the living room, and you kids come in with your jackets and shoes and snacks and destoy it in minutes.”  “I’m trying to catch the news.  Don’t bother me now.”  “What is for supper?”  “If only. . . . if only I had more money, more friends, more time, a bigger house, a different job, better friends.  If only. . .  if only he would change, if only she would do what I want her to.“  The list goes on and on, and it can be different for each of us.  But the core is the same.  We want peace, damnit.  We want peace, and we do not believe God is doing a very good job of providing it for us.

So, how does the Spirt of Christ step into the messy places of our lives, the real places where we really live, and bring peace?  The peace that joins us back to him and to others?  First of all, it is by believing that Jesus has made our peace with God.  It is finished.   We no longer have to strive. 

The corresponding word in Hebrew for peace is “shalom,”  which has the connotation of wholeness and fullness, or having been made perfect.  When we believe the gospel, we begin to grasp that Jesus has made us whole.  We no longer have to strive to make ourselves complete or worthy of love and acceptance.  This peace with God gives us peace with ourselves.  It also can grow into true peace with others.

The Bible says it like this:  Isaiah 32:17  The fruit of righteousness will be peace; the effect of righteousness will be quietness and confidence forever.  This righteousness is God’s, not our own.  When we begin to believe that we have the righteousness of Christ imputed to us, that we have his goodness and he took our sin on himself (2 Cor. 5:21), this knowledge will bear the fruit of peace in our lives.  It will join us together with God and others and bring a quietness to our hearts that speaks rest to a restless world. 

And once again,  this does not always feel peaceful.  It can be a long, messy process.  Sometimes it requires real struggle to believe and real struggle in our relationships to come to peace.  But here is our hope:  The God of peace will soon crush Satan under your feet.  Romans 16:20

Peace to you this Christmas season.

This is a fun rendition of Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer that I wanted to share for some Christmas fun.  The song is from Jewel’s wonderful Christmas album called Joy -A Holiday Collection.

One of the high school kids I counsel recently told me about a deeply inspiring story.  It is the story of the life of a boy, who was the victim of one of the worst documented cases of child abuse in the state of California.  The events took place in the late 60’s and early 70’s beforeDavid Pelzer, the survivor wrote a trilogy of his life events.  The first is pictured above, A Child Called It.  The second and third books are The Lost Boy and A Man Called Dave.  You can find the books here.

It is hard to read about such cruelty to children, but the statistics tell us that these things happen everyday.  One therapist has gathered a list of online resources that look at the different aspects and occurrences of abuse.  If you are interested in learning more, check out the findings of C.J. Newton, MA, on this site.

If you work with or are around children, it is crucial to understand and recognize the signs of child abuse and neglect.  You can also get more information about this survivor’s current work with abuse prevention and inspiration here.  Dave has appeared on Oprah, and he has a weekly radio broadcast.

“When I have no eyes for the small signs of God’s presence - the smile of a baby, the carefree play of children, the words of encouragement and gestures of love offered by friends - I will always remain tempted to despair.  The small child of Bethlehem, the unknown man of Nazareth, the rejected preacher, the naked man on the cross, he asks for my full attention.  The work of our salvation takes place in the midst of a world that continues to shout, scream, and overwhelm us with its claims and promises.”

From Advent and Christmas Wisdom from Henri J.M. Nouwen

This music is one of the most pleasant and fun ways I’ve found to date to introduce children to classical music.  (It is also pretty great for adults.)  This volume one includes Vivaldi’s Ring of Mystery, Mozart’s Magic Fantasy, Beethoven Lives Upstairs, and Mr. Bach Comes to Call. 

Each of the four discs include an intriguing combination of the music of these masters, facts about their lives, and imaginative story-telling.  If you want to learn about these amazing musicians, or if you want your children to be introduced to them, this is a delightfully engaging way to do it!  Mr. Bach Comes to Call is my personal favorite.  Mr. Bach, this dead German composer, shows up in a young British girls’ living room while she is rotely practising her piano lessons, bored to tears.  She is introduced to the wonder of his compositions and the magic of music.  Each story is unique in its approach to the presentation of the different composers.  And there is a volume two, which includes Handel and Tchaikovsky.  Very fun indeed!

Check out this groovy new online music magazine, launched today in honor of World AIDS Day.  Be sure to watch U2’s premiere video of a recently recorded version of “I Believe in Father Christmas”, and best of all watch “Playing for Change” as musicians from all over the world sing “Stand By Me.” It is extremely moving and reminds me that we really are all alike and in this together.

When I think about the word “joy”, I find myself a bit ambivalent.  On the one hand, I love joy!  I love thinking about my experiences of deep, uncensored joy.  But on the other, there is a nagging sense in which I’m thinking,  “Do I really have much joy on a daily basis?”  And at darker moments, I’m even tempted to throw in the towel because I wonder what my problem is, because I struggle on the edge of a chasm of blue funk, and when one of life’s storms blows, there is the threat of being swept over the edge.  At these moments, I feel like the promise of joy mocks me.

Last summer, when we redid our home, I was in one of those latter places.  As I shopped Hobby Lobby for accent pieces, a wooden cut-out sign with the word “joy” caught my eye.  I stubbornly refused to buy it, because inside I was thinking, “Ya gotta be kidding.  Joy?!  I need a sign that says “Survival.”  As the days and weeks passed, the thought of that little black sign continued to nag me.  I finally gave in and bought the pestering thing, realizing that it would be a sign of simple faith, a sort of reminder to myself of the gospel, that God gives joy to the undeserving, like me.

A few weeks ago, my friends and I were talking about joy as one of the fruits of the Holy Spirit.  As I pondered and studied the word, I found an interesting verse:  1 Chronicles 16:27-27 says, “For all the gods of the nations are idols, but the Lord made the heavens.  Splendor and majesty are before him; strength and joy in his dwelling place.”  At first nothing struck me as all that profound about the verse, but as I continued to think about it, the image that strength and joy are in God’s dwelling place began to chip away at my hard reserves.  The place where God resides is inhabited by joy and strength.  Then as I continued to ponder. . wait a minute. . . where does God reside these days?  Thanks to the finished work of Christ and thanks to the incomparible gift of his Spirit, he lives in those of us who place our trust in him.  So, that makes me his dwelling place.  So, strength and joy are in me, whether I feel like it at any given moment or not.  

This reminds me of Nehemiah 8:10 , in which Nehemiah declared, “Do not grieve, for the joy of the Lord is your strength.”  Until I looked back at that familiar verse, I did not realize the story in which it is spoken.  After the rebuilding of the wall of Jerusalem was completed following the exile of many of its citizens, Ezra opened the book of the Law and began to read.  As he read, the people began to weep.  I imagine the sorrow they felt, after their long exile and suffering the loss of family and friends and the destruction of their beloved city and homes.  I also imagine the sorrow they felt as they heard the words of the Lord and realized how far they had strayed from his commands.  But instead of telling them that they should weep, because after all, they deserved it, Nehemiah rather told them that it was not a time for mourning but a time for celebration.  He told them to go get choice food and sweet drinks, enough to share with everyone, and come have a PARTY.    You are forgiven.  The joy of the Lord is your strength.

And after all, this makes perfect sense.  When I look up the word “Joy” in my Greek dictionary, I find that it shares a common root word with the word “Grace.”  The Greek word for joy is “chara”, meaning joy or delight.  The Greek word for grace is “charis”, meaning bestows delight.  Joy is a grace.  It is one of those gifts that only the Supernatural can give.  It is the fruit of being delighted in.  I am an object of God’s grace, therefore I am an object of his delight.  Therefore, I can delight.  In life.  In Him.  In others.

The joy of the Lord is your strength.  Maybe this isn’t always a bubbly, overpowering sensation of happiness, though sometimes it is.  Maybe this doesn’t mean I have to always feel  joyful, though thankfully sometimes I do.  Maybe it means I don’t have to muster the strength to pretend I’m thankful or happy when I’m not, that I don’t have to  practice the “try harder gospel” to find joy.  Maybe, just maybe, this is a stronger undercurrent of God’s grace toward me, that sustains and upholds me through all that life brings.  Psalm 84:5-7 says it this way, “Blessed are those whose strength is in you, who have set their hearts on pilgrimage.  As they pass through the Valley of Baca (bitterness), they make it a place of springs;  the autumn rains also cover it with pools.  They go from strength to strength, till each appears before God in Zion.”

Hallelujah!  The joy of the Lord is my strength.  How about you?